For your in-laws, you are not learning a language. You are learning about thirty sentences, said well, in the right moment. That changes which tool wins. A tutor is best if you can afford a weekly lesson and will do the homework. A speaking-first app is best for the daily, private practice that makes a sentence automatic. An audio course is best on the commute, but it cannot hear you. Most people I have watched succeed used two of the three, and all of them used their partner. Here is how to choose by your situation, honestly, with no brand names.
I'm Akhil. I'm Indian, my wife is British, and she learned Hindi for my family before our first big trip to Delhi. I have since had this conversation with a lot of partners of Indian people, usually at a wedding, usually in a slight panic. This is what I tell them. The phrases themselves are in learning Hindi for your partner's Indian family; this post is about how to practise them.
What "Hindi for the in-laws" actually contains
Write the list down before you pick a tool, because the list is small and the tools are built for something bigger.
- The greeting. Namaste (hello), and for elders the fuller forms. Hindi greetings beyond namaste covers which one for whom.
- The food. "Bahut tasty hai" (it is really tasty) and the three ways to say you are full that actually work. See how to compliment food in Hindi.
- The question you will be asked daily. "Khana khaya?" (have you eaten?) and the replies: how to answer khana khaya.
- Who is who. Mausi, bua, chachi, nani: Hindi words for family members. Using the right one is worth more than any grammar.
- Respect. Aap (formal you) for elders, tum (friendly you) for your partner and cousins. Getting this one wrong is the only mistake that actually changes the room.
- Ten sentences about you. Your name, your work, your city, "main Hindi seekh raha hoon" (man) / "main Hindi seekh rahi hoon" (woman): I am learning Hindi.
Around thirty sentences, plus the five or six sounds English does not have, plus a little culture. That is the whole job. A tool that wants to teach you Hindi is overshooting. A tool that helps you say thirty sentences well is on target.
The tutor
What a tutor is good at: hearing you, live, and fixing the exact thing that was wrong. Teaching the words your partner's family actually uses, if you bring those words to the lesson. Role-playing the dinner before the dinner. Answering "but what do I say when auntie does X".
What a tutor is bad at: the hundred repetitions. A lesson a week gives you one hour of speaking. A phrase becomes automatic after it has left your mouth many dozens of times, and nobody can afford to pay a human to listen to that. Tutors also default to the textbook syllabus unless you stop them, so by week three you may be learning the days of the week when you needed "aur khao" (eat more) survival lines.
How to use one well: tell them your goal in the first message: "I want to speak with my partner's family, in roman letters, no script, both gender forms of every verb." Bring a list of the family's actual phrases, recorded by your partner. Ask for scenarios, not chapters. If the tutor insists on the alphabet first, find another tutor.
The audio course
What it is good at: no screen, no script, listen and repeat on the commute. The spaced repetition is built in. For the rhythm of a sentence, hearing it forty times in a week is a real advantage.
What it is bad at: it cannot hear you. You say the line, it moves on, and you have no idea whether your t was the Hindi one or the English one. The sentences are also generic by design: a course built for everyone cannot know that your in-laws are Punjabi, that the grandmother is the one to impress, or that nobody in that house says the textbook word for thank you. See how to say thank you in Hindi for why.
How to use one well: as the listening half of a pair. Audio in the car, then a tool with feedback at home to check what you actually sound like.
The speaking-first app
What it is good at: the daily hundred repetitions, in private, with feedback. You say the phrase, it scores every sound, you say it again. Scenario-based ones teach the dinner table and the wedding rather than the alphabet. It is the only tool that is there at 11pm the night before the visit.
What it is bad at: it is not a human. It cannot tell you what your particular mother-in-law meant by that look. If the family speaks Gujarati, Tamil or Bengali at home, a Hindi app teaches you the wrong language, and you should check that before anything else. And an app only works if you open it; nobody is waiting for you.
How to use one well: fifteen minutes a day, out loud, mic on. Pick the chapters that match your next event and ignore the rest. Treat the pronunciation score as the point, not a game.
Choose by your situation
| Your situation | Start with | Add | Why |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wedding in six weeks | Speaking-first app, the wedding and food chapters | Your partner, five minutes a night | You need thirty phrases automatic, fast, and the practice has to be private |
| In-laws visiting for three weeks | Speaking-first app, daily | A tutor, two sessions before they land | Role-play the first evening with a human, then drill it alone |
| Long-term relationship, no deadline | A tutor, fortnightly | App on the days between | A human keeps you honest over months; the app fills the gap |
| Long commute, little home time | Audio course in the car | App at the weekend to check your sounds | Repetition where you have time, feedback where you have a mic |
| Family speaks another Indian language at home | Ask your partner which language first | Then the right tool for that language | Hindi may still be understood, but it is not the language of that kitchen |
| Very shy about speaking | Speaking-first app, alone, for a month | Then a tutor | Get the sounds right in private before a human hears you |
The combination that works
Here is the routine I have seen succeed most often. It is boring, which is why it works.
- Fifteen minutes a day, out loud, with feedback. App or tutor homework. Mouth moving. If your mouth was not moving, it did not count.
- Five minutes with your partner, most evenings. One exchange only: a greeting, a question about their day, an answer. The same one for a week until it is boring. Then the next.
- A human, sometimes. A tutor fortnightly if you can, or a friendly cousin on a video call if you cannot. The job is correction and courage, not new material.
- Listening, in the gaps. Audio, Hindi films with subtitles, the family WhatsApp voice notes. 50 Hinglish sentences from the family WhatsApp group is what that register sounds like written down.
Timelines for this are in how long does it take to learn Hindi. For the in-laws goal, the honest answer is weeks, not years, if the mouth-moving rule holds.
The tool none of the above replaces: your partner
Your partner is the only source of your family's actual words, and the worst possible teacher of grammar. Use them for the first thing and never the second. Ask them to record ten phrases on your phone, slowly, then at normal speed. Ask what their mum says when the food is good, what their dad says when someone arrives, what everyone calls the grandmother. Then take those recordings to the app or the tutor and practise them there. If your partner starts explaining why the verb goes at the end, change the subject. That way lies an argument, and the verb will go at the end whether or not either of you can explain it.
Where Hinglish Vinglish fits
Hinglish Vinglish is the speaking-first app in the table. I built it for exactly this situation, because it was mine. The chapters are Dinner Time, In-Laws, Shaadi Time, Chai Time and Family & Relationships, everything is in English letters, a native voice says each phrase first, and the mic scores every sound with Ellie, the app's elephant coach, telling you what to fix. It is not a human and it does not know your mother-in-law. It is free for 7 days with every chapter open, then a one-time unlock, no subscription, on iOS and Android. Who it is for and who it is not for is on the app page. If you can afford a tutor and you will do the homework, a tutor plus this app is the strongest pair I know.
FAQ
Is an app or a tutor better for learning Hindi for in-laws?
A tutor is better for live correction and your family's exact words. An app is better for the daily private repetition that makes a phrase automatic. For most people the answer is a speaking-first app every day plus a tutor sometimes. If you must pick one and you are shy, start with the app; if you have money and discipline, start with the tutor.
How many Hindi phrases do I need for my partner's family?
About thirty, said well: greetings, food, the "have you eaten" exchange, the relatives' names, aap and tum, and ten sentences about yourself. The list is in the partner's family guide linked above. Fluency is a different project and your in-laws are not expecting it.
Can I learn Hindi for my in-laws without learning the script?
Yes. Nothing on the thirty-sentence list needs to be read. Learn the script later if you want to read invitations or signs on a trip. What you cannot skip is the sounds, so choose a tool that plays native audio and scores your pronunciation.
What if my partner's family speaks Punjabi or Gujarati, not Hindi?
Ask before you start. Many Indian families understand Hindi, but the language of the kitchen may be another one, and your effort lands harder in that one. If the family uses Hindi with outsiders and their own language at home, Hindi is still a good first step and the respect words carry across.
Should my partner teach me Hindi?
Let them record phrases and tell you what the family actually says. Do not let them teach grammar. Chances are they learned Hindi by hearing it and cannot explain the rules, and the lesson turns into a disagreement. Bring their recordings to a tool that can correct you.
Akhil Madan, founder of Keeda Studios. My wife used an app daily, me for five minutes a night, and a cousin on video calls for courage. The cousin was free and the app was the one I ended up building.